(NOTE: I drafted this post a while ago. Update at the bottom.)
So, oil pulling. This was a new thing to me when my friend Shannon (hi!) posted this article on Facebook. It sounded ridiculous and disgusting, so obviously I had to try it.
The theory is that swishing natural oils around in your mouth for EXACTLY 20 minutes helps detox the mouth, improve oral health, and supposedly provides a host of other benefits, including improving TMJ symptoms.
Hey, I have that!
Coconut oil has antibacterial/antifungal properties (so they say), and plaque is supposed to stick to the oil. In the interest of giving things a shot if they’re not going to hurt anyone… yeah, we’ll try it.
So let’s see… one tablespoon.
Screw that. I gag on my toothbrush. There’s no WAY this is going to end well. We’ll start with a teaspoon of pure virgin CO.
Note to self: melt the oil in the microwave next time, even if commenters on the article are like, “I GUESS you can melt it first if you’re a WUSS.”
Okay, so that melted pretty quickly. Now, swish around for twenty minutes.
Oh, sweet floundering Neptune.
If this isn’t the least pleasant texture I’ve ever experienced, it’s close. SLIMY COCONUT-FLAVORED BLEEEEEH.
Oh. Saliva. How nice of you to show up.
[Five minutes later]
Well, that was interesting.
Yes, I lasted five minutes before I started gagging and had to spit it out into the trash can. How was that? Here’s a quote from another article for you:
“The oil will get thicker and milky as it mixed with saliva during this time and it should be creamy-white when spit out.”
So… yeah. I’m going to be mature about this and just walk away from that one.
As for the results: Hmm. Well, it got gunk out from between my teeth as well as flossing does. My teeth feel slippery… I guess that’s a good thing? No immediate whitening benefit, but at this point I doubt anything can help me with that.
Annnnd my tongue was so slippery that it just fell out of my mouth and crawled away. It’s hiding under the stove, quivering.
That’s kind of awkward.
Could I do this first thing in the morning? I don’t know. I guess I’ll give it a shot if it might help with the TMJ. Maybe it’s one of those things you get used to, like using a neti pot (also eew, but it does clear the sinuses).
Still, I’m looking forward to moving on to making a body scrub out of CO and sugar. That sounds like a LOT more fun!
UPDATE: After a few days of trying this, my time-to-violent-gagging went from five minutes to an impressive ONE MINUTE. This might not be for me.
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