Older Engrish

I have a special treat for you guys today. I recently dug out this old dollar store children’s diary I found several years ago. I forgot how good the Engrish is. Most of it is weird, random sayings. Some of it is just… well, look at the cover. (I’ll type it out, in case you can’t see it on your screen)

“Good Luck
You’re always on my mind I’ll be there until the end of time
My heart is flammable when I see your beautiful eyes.”

Um… thanks, sleepy sheep!

And in case you didn’t get the message there at the top:


It only gets better.


You have a way of making me really
high on life.”

“Wishing you every success in your future career”

I have come here to give you good luck”

“Let’s go! Hurry up! Welcome to fat land  Oh, shit too past”

I’m sorry, what was that again?


That’s what I thought you said.

Engrish, you are SO GROUNDED.


About Kate Sparkes

Kate Sparkes was born in Hamilton, Ontario, but now resides in Newfoundland, where she tries not to talk too much about the dragons she sees in the fog. She lives with six cats, two dogs, and just the right amount of humans. USA Today bestselling author of the Bound Trilogy (mature YA Fantasy), Into Elurien, and Vines and Vices. Writing dark, decadent, and deadly Urban Fantasy as Tanith Frost. www.katesparkes.com www.tanithfrost.com View all posts by Kate Sparkes

4 responses to “Older Engrish

  • Elizabeth Collins

    OMG!!!!!! LMOA. I think that is actually Englinese (Japanese that was badly translated to English… that what is seems like with all the japanimation)

  • L. Marie

    Oh my word!!!!!! I had to read some of these a few times to make sure I read the sayings right. I’m going to make this my personal motto: “My heart is flammable when I see your beautiful eyes.” And since I have some stuffed sheep, well, it kinda seems a given.

  • Jae

    I love beet wishes. They usually tend to work out better than best wishes. I think you have to wish over the beet on a full moon in the middle of the night when your heart is super flammable, though. Sometimes that can be hard, especially if you’re in fat land, and ESPECIALLY if things get too past. I love that they attempted poetry though. Aw, cute lil Engrish writers.

    Thanks for making my day!

  • Professor VJ Duke

    That’s hilarious! The girl ‘beeting wishes’ is scary to me…

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